Saturday, April 26, 2008


Finally, the weather was actually inviting one to experience it rather than saying "DON'T be nuts. Stay inside, moron" loud and clear. I was at work, and in a moment of partial procrastination and succumbing to the temptation that looking out the window produced, I walked outside the back door and stood there for a few minutes, leaning up against a brick staircase and watching the traffic go by on the nearby street.

Then, I saw a kid--a boy about six or seven years old--run behind the building, coming from the square around the front. He was shirtless, his shorts a little long for him, and his face was beet red presumably from having been out in the sun. He stopped next to a pickup truck that was parked in the loading zone there, pulled his shorts down, and peed on the pavement there in my full view. I felt bad enough that he entered my line of sight and chose to remain there while he relieved himself that I looked away, hoping that when I turned my head back, his pants would have been closer to his waistline.

After he finished, he walked towards me on the sidewalk, heading for the stairway I was leaning on. As he passed me, he gave me this "what's your problem?" look.


Saturday, April 19, 2008

Apology to Self

Dear Self--

I am writing to wholeheartedly apologize for removing a recent post from your blog. I understand why you felt you needed to do that, and this is no reflection on the validity of that judgement. Someone very close to you for whom you care a great deal felt that what you wrote wasn't as balanced as you perceived your handling of the subject you chose to write about. Perhaps that may be true, perhaps not. The point is that I understand you were so surprised at having hurt someone you care about so much, you didn't feel you had much of a choice. It was also clear that other people thought that was "the right thing to do" at the time.

However, I promise you never to do that again.

It is useful here to consider what the purpose of this blog really is, and I know you put a lot of thought into that after you deleted that post.

* * * * * * *

No one blogs to hurt people--some do so to share information, some to connect family together, some to discuss a certain experience in their lives. The bottom line is that some people will like what you write and some people won't.

Lots of people, I am sure, do not like this blog or perhaps even me personally. You may not like me because I am a woman, or a liberal, or because I like history or because I take photographs you think are horrible. However, I didn't start writing here because I thought that everyone would like what I had to say. If you are upset with me and what I have written, I ask you first and foremost to remember that my intention is NEVER to hurt anyone. Then, I ask you to weigh two things on my behalf--whether you are upset with me because a composition of mine unapologetically levels some kind of judgement on something relating to you in a cruel way without sympathy or whether I may have written something with which you simply may not agree. I hope, sincerely, that if you are amongst those who care about me, people who remind me how blessed I am and thankful I should be, that my asking for this consideration on your part is not an unreasonable request.

First, my heartfelt apology for hurting anyone for whom I care so dear. I am sure it is hard to believe, but it hurts me more to know someone I know was hurt by me inadvertently. Second, however, is my resolve that I have to stick up for this blog and why I keep it. It is entirely understandable that I be asked to be sensitive to the feelings of others. However, it is important for me to be clear--this is my blog and my space here. If I am inconsiderate to you personally, I welcome your checking me on that point without question. If I present an opinion with which you do not agree, though, I only ask that you recognize my right to have that opinion and express it in my space. Many people disagree with my opinions, and every blog post is, in essence, a discussion. There is a "Comments" section at the end of every post. I welcome all insights, and I have never deleted a comment unless it was "spam" or was obscene in language or content.

You are welcome to disagree, but please do not ask me to avoid writing about certain things because we disagree on those subjects. I sincerely hope that my resolve will not alienate anyone I care about, and I believe if those individuals will only do me the favor of remembering my right to have an opinion and express it, even if it isn't the same as their own, there is a common ground of understanding to be found there.

A sincere thank you from me to everyone who pops in to this blog from time to time--people I know and people I have never met in person--and my appreciation for all thoughts and comments expressed on my posts. I enjoy reading what you have to say, on the blogs of others and in response to what I have written here.

Now, it's fabulous outside, so on to the rest of the day.