Monday, September 07, 2009

Fatal Accident Caused By....?

I have come to the conclusion that there is one thing far more distracting, and therefore, far more dangerous, than text messaging while driving.

It's the mosquito in the car.

I'm sure it surprises no one who has at least seen the moth photograph that I live in a slightly remote area in northern New England (where else would one find a moth with a twelve-inch wingspan who could easily audition for the next X-Man movie?). A combination of mild temperatures and lots of rain resulted in a spike in the creepy wildlife category out here this year. For example, one night upon taking out the trash, I noticed that there were at least five frogs on my car.

Nothing beats the mosquitoes. Absolutely nothing. I haven't been able to walk across my lawn once without dousing myself in a hefty dose of Deep Woods Off. While this is inconvenient, reentering the house generally disperses the cloud of noisy bloodsuckers, and those that are unfortunate enough to make it indoors are quickly hunted down and consumed by the cats.

The car is another issue entirely. It's trapped; you're trapped and belted to the seat. At first, it bounces along the dashboard, on and off the windshield attempting escape through the glass. Then, it may drift over to the window where you make a desperate dash to open it to let it out. When that's not successful, you lose sight of it somewhere, and patches all over your skin start to tingle and crawl. Wherever you think you've been bitten, you've only managed to whack unadulterated skin, but when you get out of the car, you notice at least two or three welts where you least expect them to be. And, if you're unlucky enough, it will be waiting for you in there, probably eager for another meal, when you get back inside the car to drive home again.

All the while you're engaged in a battle of wits with an insect no larger than a fingernail shard, you drift around the road, cross the yellow lines a few times, and tailgate that guy in front of you to near a rear-end job.

I wonder how many accidents may have been caused by the simple mosquito in the car. I am certain, however, that there are no statistics to report on this phenomenon.


Ulrike said...

I totally agree with you: they are dangerous because they are so distracting.
I used to live in a very mozzie infested area. Before I drove anywhere, I used to burn a stick of incense in the car about half an hour beforehand, with all windows and doors shut. Probably a bit dangerous, and the car certainly looked like a smoke bomb when I opened the door to get in, but it BEAT the mozzies.

The villager: said...

In the UK the authorities have traditionally blamed drink for many motor accidents; I hadn't thought about insects before.

Jean-Luc Picard said...

I could well imagine the trouble a winged monster would cause.

booda baby said...

One of my favorite things of ALL time (isn't it EVERYONE's?) - someone turning me on to something I never thought of before. So yay. And then :( because no that I've thought about it because YOU thought about it, the idea will haunt me. They are sneaky little bastards to begin with. I bet they think they can drive better than me, too.

gagknee said...

not dangerous enough to warrant pulling over, like, say, a bee or wasp, but more annoying and distracting than a fly because we know they are trying to suck our blood.

also, they are impossible to kill by smacking them when they land on a window. killing them it seems is usually a two hand operation.

AZ said...

Except for the mosquitoes, I'd love to reside in a verdant area filled with many different types of animals. I used to live in the northeast and it was a hell of a lot better than Texas. Here, plastered armadillos are the joy of many highway drivers.

HeatherLynn said...

Oh, you can count me in on this one, this was totally me last week!...everything just as you said!

lol....those b@stards! ;)

great post!


HeatherLynn said...

your place sounds a lot like my sister's in Wisconsin. We were there in May, and literarlly our entire family was nearly picked up and flown off to be devoured by a pack of them!

between that and the deer's like wild kingdom up there! Makes my small town in Ohio look like NYC in comparison! :)


Andrea said...

Ha! Yes - living here in the South - we have our share of those little leaches! They are talented here! They thrive in our lovely humid metropolis and have found ways of evolving to survive and hunt even in the winter! If it's not the mosquito it's his pesky cousin, the nat! Drive safe and fight those suckers one beastie at a time!